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In today’s interconnected world, understanding and practising ‘Right Relationship’ in our interactions with cultures different from our own is crucial. It is even more important that we consider this in the context of our spirituality.

My personal Contemporary Irish Paganism is absolutely rooted in me working in right relationship with every aspect of Irish cosmology, and every entity I encounter or call on. Even the very land itself, and our sacred sites, deserve CĂłir Choibhneas.

✹ Post by Lora O’Brien

This concept, rooted in respect and reciprocity, helps us navigate the complex world of cultural appreciation versus appropriation. It’s more than just a set of guidelines; it’s a mindset that fosters deeper understanding and ethical interactions with the rich diversity of global cultures.

Right Relationship – CĂłir Choibhneas
CĂłir – https://www.teanglann.ie/en/fgb/c%c3%b3ir
Coibhneas – https://www.teanglann.ie/en/fgb/coibhneas

In this article, we’ll explore what Right Relationship is, and how we can make sure we are working and walking in Right Relationship for our own spiritual practices.

Learning and Engaging Respectfully

The journey towards a ‘Right Relationship’ starts with genuine, respectful learning. It’s about delving into the depths of a culture – its history, its struggles, its achievements.

As an Irish author and historian, I’ve always emphasised the importance of authentic sources.

>>> Our Free Trustworthy Sources Checklist is Here

When learning about another culture, especially one that you did not grow up in yourself, or have not lived in for an extensive period… engage with material from reputable scholars and native practitioners for the most accurate and respectful understanding possible.

And always remember, you have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Listen more than you speak!

Supporting Native Voices and Creators

A significant aspect of ‘Right Relationship’ is uplifting native voices. It’s essential to support and empower the people within the culture you’re engaging with.

This means purchasing art and materials directly from them, promoting native educators and artists, and participating in their events and seminars. The Old Knitting Factory in County Galways is a great example of this, though there are many more too.

>>> This article provides more links and resources.

Can you volunteer some time? Can you seek donations for them through your local Irish club or centre?

Such actions go beyond respect; they offer tangible support and acknowledgment, and ensure native creators have the space and support to grow, without competing for our own cultural expression and creativity.

Right Relationship & Financial Contribution

Your financial contributions can significantly impact charities and organisations that benefit the source culture. These contributions are especially vital when they support initiatives focused on preserving traditions, language, and heritage.

Talk to Irish people to find out who they support. Look up Facebook groups or pages on topics such as Irish Language (Gaeilge), Irish Dance, Irish Music, Irish Folklore, Irish History and Heritage, and find the groups, charities, organisations, and local interest groups that are doing the work on the ground.

(Make sure you check what country they are based in by viewing the Primary Location… This Video shows you how.)

Similarly, by enrolling in courses or workshops offered by native practitioners, you’re not only learning but also supporting their livelihoods and, in turn, the cultural economy. (Our obvious vested interest in this aside, we also support many other native Irish teachers through our platform. See a Full List Here.)

Fostering Respectful Cultural Exchange

Collaboration and cultural exchange, when done respectfully and reciprocally, can lead to enriching experiences for everyone involved. Ensure that these collaborations are consensual and beneficial to the source culture.

For this, please consider hosting Irish people at festivals and events in your local area, to which they may not have had access to previously. What we do NOT any more of is English and North American people coming to Ireland and organising tours or events here. We can do that ourselves, thanks, and you are taking up space and resources that would be better served by native creators, guides, and event organisers.

Find the events that are already happening here and organise a group to come and attend! Or invite Irish speakers and teachers and authors and artists and to what’s happening in your locality, enabling us to expand our reach and bring some (often much needed) authenticity to what’s happening near you!

It’s about creating partnerships that honour both cultures equally, without overshadowing or diluting the cultural essence of either party.

Advocacy – Using Your Voice for Cultural Sensitivity

Raising awareness about issues facing the source culture is paramount. Use your platform, no matter the size, to advocate for their rights and representation.

Find those local Irish charities and organisations and share their links, events, fund raisers, articles, and all the rest on your own facebook, instagram, or make a tiktok or a youtube video (or whatever is the platform to be on at the moment!) about them, to raise awareness and amplify their voices… without speaking over them.

Educating others about the differences between cultural appreciation and appropriation is vital in mitigating misunderstandings and fostering respect.

Here is a helpful short video on the topic – Cultural Appropriation or Appreciation?

Reflecting on Your Cultural Interactions

An integral part of maintaining a ‘Right Relationship’ is continuous self-reflection. Regularly assess your practices and beliefs, ensuring they align with respect and appreciation, not appropriation.

Being open to feedback and willing to change your approach based on guidance from those within the culture is key. Most often, if someone is taking the time to correct or try to educate you, they are doing it for your benefit, rather than theirs. And they are doing it because they believe there is some value to you. So pay attention. Listen, and learn.

“Do the best you can until you know better. Then, when you know better, do better.” 

Maya Angelou, Legend.

Speaking of knowing better, and doing better…

A Note on the Grammar of Right Relationship

In recent student discussions about CĂłir Choibhneas, or ‘right relationship’, I was having a moment of grammatical uncertainty. You know when you look at something you’ve seen a hundred times and suddenly it just doesn’t look right?!

This prompt me reaching out to some Irish language friends, and I had a detailed conversation with Amy O’Riordan, the Crafty Cailleach, whose linguistic expertise was invaluable.

When writing my 2019 book, “A Practical Guide to Pagan Priesthood”, I had consulted my cousin, a fluent Irish speaker, who originally translated ‘right relationship’ as CĂłir Choibhneas. Though comfortable with the individual meanings of these words, I suddenly had doubts about their order, given the nuances of Irish Gaeilge syntax.

Irish generally follows a different structural pattern, so I wondered if the phrase CĂłir Choibhneas was oddly arranged. Amy explained that in Irish, CĂłir is versatile, appearing both before and after in various phrases. This reassured me about the translation my cousin had provided years earlier.

The concept of ‘right relationship’, while not traditionally named as such in Irish, is a common cultural theme. Amy noted examples like BrethiĂșnas CĂłir (just judgement) and Caint CĂłir (decent speech), where CĂłir follows the noun, contrasting with instances where it precedes, as in CĂłir Oibre (working facilities).

However, my grasp of Irish grammar, particularly the tuiseal ginideach (genitive case) and modh coinnĂ­ollach (conditional mood), has always been limited. Amy clarified that CĂłir Choibhneas technically implies plural relationships, while CĂłir Choibhnis would be singular.

Alternatively, Coibhneas CĂłir and Coibhneasa CĂłra could be used for singular and plural, though Amy noted that further confirmation of the genitive plurals was needed for those!

In terms of pronunciation, both phrases sound similar, with slight dialectical variations. Despite these nuances, CĂłir Choibhneas, as I’ve consistently used it, remains grammatically correct, encapsulating the essence of ‘right relationship’. Whether in singular or plural form, the phrase is suitable, allowing for flexibility in usage.

This linguistic exploration, though seemingly a detour, underscores the importance of thorough research and openness to correction. It’s vital for fostering a respectful, supportive, and contributive engagement with cultures, particularly in the context of right relationship practices.

In Right Relationship

In conclusion, practising ‘Right Relationship’ – CĂłir Choibnis – in cultural engagement is a dynamic process. It requires mindfulness, respect, and a continuous willingness to learn and adapt.

This approach enriches not only our own understanding, but also contributes positively to the global tapestry of cultures, ensuring that cultural diversity is not just preserved but also respected and engaged with in a manner that honours its true essence.


😟 BUT HANG ON


What if you don’t have any Irish ancestry or Irish heritage? But you still feel a strong connection to Ireland, even if you can’t explain it? Can you still be in Right Relationship with Ireland, and Irish Ancestors?

Don’t worry, we have resources for you as well (and of course, much of the above is still applicable, and you’re so very welcome too! Right Relationship is for EVERYONE.)

Connect with the Past: Embrace the Wisdom of Irish Ancestry.

🍃Embark on an ancestral quest with our free 5-day email series, “Roots and Reverence”. Whether you carry Irish blood or an affinity for Celtic spirituality, this journey through Ireland’s rich heritage is for you. Connect with your past, honour these ancestors, and weave ancient wisdom into your life.

🔗 Click to Start your Journey!

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